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boymeat at 12:38am on 08/10/2002
boymeat at 12:38am on 08/10/2002I've been sitting here at my computer for the past 4+ hours, contemplating how to teach SM 101 this weekend at Dungeon 701, down in Florida. Something I have always taken for granted has become quite the task... teach the basics of SM to a crowd mixed with complete newbies and advanced players.
My mind... searching for myriads of ways to procrastinate... became very pensive. Thinking about all the different people that touch my life in their own ways. Relationships past... relationships to come... and relationships changing before my eyes in the present. I have always thought... how much love can one being give? How much do I have within to share?
I think I figured out that the amount of love I have to give is equal and/or greater to the amount of love given to me. And as I sit here... I realize that I have been blessed with love... limitless bounds of love... from friends to soulmates. I consider myself one of the most privileged in the world... and it is because of it that I seek to share as much love as I can with those that cross my travels.
In my procrastination... I pushed play on the Blues Traveler "Save His Soul" album. I have always been drawn towards this album... it serves as a soothing respite to the beast within me. At the end is an epic piece, "Fledgling." I first listened to this song 2 days before my high school graduation... and I cried. I cried not even understanding the lyrics... just knowing it meant so much to me. In ways I couldn't describe.
I cried again tonight. Fledging represents the growth of the human spirit. Of continuing ones journey through self-discovery and advancement. Of change, and embracing that change. Of fear, and embracing that fear, and submitting to the sheer freedom it gives. I look around to all my compatriots, and I see that growth in everyone... in everything. In people I will share the rest of my life with... Kate... Lolita... my family. In my friends... Tessa... Devina.. Spike & Daisy... everyone. In people who I love deeply, and yet am experiencing those very changes talked about with... Luna. To my nieces... and my new nephew. Changes everywhere... self-discovery. Life.
( Allow me to share with you this song. And the lyrics that make me tear everytime. )
My mind... searching for myriads of ways to procrastinate... became very pensive. Thinking about all the different people that touch my life in their own ways. Relationships past... relationships to come... and relationships changing before my eyes in the present. I have always thought... how much love can one being give? How much do I have within to share?
I think I figured out that the amount of love I have to give is equal and/or greater to the amount of love given to me. And as I sit here... I realize that I have been blessed with love... limitless bounds of love... from friends to soulmates. I consider myself one of the most privileged in the world... and it is because of it that I seek to share as much love as I can with those that cross my travels.
In my procrastination... I pushed play on the Blues Traveler "Save His Soul" album. I have always been drawn towards this album... it serves as a soothing respite to the beast within me. At the end is an epic piece, "Fledgling." I first listened to this song 2 days before my high school graduation... and I cried. I cried not even understanding the lyrics... just knowing it meant so much to me. In ways I couldn't describe.
I cried again tonight. Fledging represents the growth of the human spirit. Of continuing ones journey through self-discovery and advancement. Of change, and embracing that change. Of fear, and embracing that fear, and submitting to the sheer freedom it gives. I look around to all my compatriots, and I see that growth in everyone... in everything. In people I will share the rest of my life with... Kate... Lolita... my family. In my friends... Tessa... Devina.. Spike & Daisy... everyone. In people who I love deeply, and yet am experiencing those very changes talked about with... Luna. To my nieces... and my new nephew. Changes everywhere... self-discovery. Life.
( Allow me to share with you this song. And the lyrics that make me tear everytime. )
grateful
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